Hooking Up in New York City

Today’s NY Times Styles section offers a preview of a new book called by the provocative title, “The Hooking Up Handbook,” that details what young stylish women in their 20s think about dating and sex in the 00s. Alex Williams interviewed a pack of women wearing low slung $200 jeans in a trendy Village bar:

“Yes, they take pride in having thrown off the shackles of earlier generations of single women. They are not waiting on Friday night hoping “he” will call. They make the first move. They happily see two or three guys simultaneously. Spontaneity is crucial, but even more is a good clean exit strategy from any guy who turns out to be Mr. Not Exactly.

“It’s not that people aren’t dating…it’s that there’s this weird gray area. People still want to be in relationships, but they don’t want to be settling.”

But even as they raise pink drinks in the air and roll their eyes at the absurdity of commitment, these are not women embracing sexual abandon. The courtship rites of this generation of urban singles seem to borrow from the mores of their grandmothers in the 1950’s (date lots of boys; smooch, spoon, nuzzle or neck to your heart’s content, but hold out for that pledge pin from Mr. Right) as much as from those of their mothers’ love-the-one-you’re-with 70’s.”